What's the Plan?

What's the plan to get my life on track, you ask?

I've decided to test myself. I want to test how well I can keep up with realistic goals. I'm going to set some goals for myself for the next year or so and see how it goes.

Hopefully writing this blog will help me stick to it.

Some of my hopeful, yet realistic goals include:

Being financially comfortable:

• Be 100% Free of Student Debt. I would like to pay off my student debt completely by the end of 2013.
• Minimize and track my spending. I spend way too much money on unnecessary things. I eat out a lot and buy too many expensive clothes/purses/shoes/gadgets that I could definitely live without and clearly cannot afford.
• I would like to save more. I've neglected my savings account long enough. It's time to think about my future and save for long term goals.

Travel more:

• I really do want to travel and explore the world before I'm 30yrs old. My goal is to apply for the SWAP Working Holiday program as soon as my student debt is paid off. The program basically allows you to live and work abroad for up to 2 years giving you the chance to travel and explore your chosen country and its surrounding areas. I've always dreamed of exploring Europe and experiencing the history and culture. Hopefully, by early 2014 I will be financially ready to fulfill my traveling dreams. I would love to live in the UK and see the rest of Europe.

Find my passion and ultimately, my independence:

The ultimate goal is to find my self and my true passion. I've always lived a guarded life. Being the youngest of five children, I was always told what to do and who to be. I'm 26 years old and I've never lived alone. I've always had a family member guiding me and leading the way for me. Most 26 yr olds would say they feel grown up at this age. I, however, still feel like a little girl. I hunger for adventure and independence. I can't even begin to explain how badly I want to break free and be able to stand on my own. I love my family and I know I would miss them dearly if  (and when) I decide to finally go my on way, but gaining my independence is my ultimate goal. With independence, I know I'll find myself. What I like and dislike. Form my own opinions and finally be the woman I always wanted to be, completely independent and accomplished.

Wish me luck!

x

Accepting Failed Expectations

Ever find yourself thinking this is not how you expected your life to turn out?

I think about it everyday.

Not in a depressed-midlife-crisis kind of way or anything. I've just realized that nothing in my life has really turned out the way I thought it would.

I always thought that I would be this successful, independent career woman after high school. I was going to have a successful career by 23, married by 24 and have my first child at 26 years old. Clearly, I was delusional.

I'm now nearly 26 years old, single, career-less, drowning in student debt, and completely clueless about life.

I remember vaguely in my final year of high school, my guidance councillor, Mrs. O'Brien, asked me what I wanted to do after graduation. I remember staring at her, not knowing what to say or how to answer. I believe it was the very first crossroad in my life....and I ended up taking the wrong turn.

I chose to take a year off after high school to "figure out" what I wanted to do with my life. I worked random jobs, living paycheck to paycheck. I told myself (and everyone else) that I was going save some money for college and travel a little to help find my passion in life. I ended up doing neither of those things. One year became two, then three, and then four. I had zero savings and absolutely no money for traveling. I was exhausted and unhappy. I wanted change, but had no idea which direction in life to take next. I felt like I wasted four precious years of life.

Eventually, I enrolled in college. I had my first student loan at the age of 23. I studied business for three years. I figured that it was the most expansive (random) program and would likely bring forth a rewarding career. I majored in international business because I thought it would grant me the opportunity to travel the world. I went into the program with so many doubts and graduated full of confidence and high expectations for the future. I was ready to conquer the world and the job market. Little did I know, the job market could only afford to hire me on never ending contractual terms. It's been almost two years since I graduated and I have yet to find an organization willing to take me on as a full time permanent employee. I was even laid off as a contractual employee. It was heartbreaking. 

Now, here I am again nearly 26 years old, single, career-less, drowning in student debt, and still trying to figure out my life's purpose and passion. More than ever, I wish to travel the world. I want to find myself and discover my passion. I don't want to be stuck in this "contractually employed" limbo, but for now this is my reality and I will have to accept it and learn to work with it. Sometimes, I think about the choices I've made and how different my life could've of been had I made different choices earlier. Then, I get sad and feel pitiful about myself. And I realize, what's the point of regretting the past? It's not like we can go back and re-live it again. 

I guess the whole point of this is to say, accept your failed expectations and move on. Better yet, LIVE ON. Continue to live life, even if it means working contractual jobs, living paycheck to paycheck, dreaming about traveling the world, meeting your soul mate and finding your passion in life. 

I believe that everything happens for a reason and it will all fall into place in time.

I will continue to work my contractual jobs and pay off my student loans.
I will travel the world and maybe even live abroad sometime in the near future.
I will find my life's passion and find my bliss.. in time!

x